Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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