p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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