well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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