How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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