I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize