Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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