remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
