wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I just forgot I was standing up.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
