they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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