I wish i was in the wii world.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Randomize
