Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
