Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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