It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
