Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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