No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize