I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
