before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
