erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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