I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
