I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
