It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
i believe in u and ur pee
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