Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
