Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
