Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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