so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
