1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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