we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
