Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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