Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
