Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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