No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
