Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
