Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
