Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
