Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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