Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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