Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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