Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
My vagina is very pro this idea
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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