Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
it was like having sex with a tree stump
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
