so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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