4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
