a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
