my mouth tastes like poor choices
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
