He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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