dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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