i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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