Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
