..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
