Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize