plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
