guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize